Its just so hard to make people understand
How this fills my body with sand and makes it hard to move,
How time feels so raw and real, ticking by as if I was paralysed by its grip.
And everything feels as if it is to late.
How lonely I sometimes become,
But how horrible it feels to subject the ones I love to my terror inside.
My stare becomes distant, I lose my will to speak and I try to hide away.
Why do I have to be so difficult
I don't mean to be so frustrating.
I feel weak.
I feel tired.
I'm cold and my minds a mess.
But I don't want to be alone.
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